,
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boots. "Fine." CK's lifted his eyebrows, and Andy hurried to continue. "I actually mean it. It was good to be back at work." "And?" There were times when you had to be the Dom, not the man. Now was one of them. Andy didn't even try to get out of it. "I've decided that I had good reason to break down." "Yeah?" It might not sound like much, but CK had a feeling that this was important to Andy. "Yes. It happened, and it was bad. Maybe I should have gotten out earlier, but it still happened, and it wasn't good for me. Now I just need to figure out how to get all the way back together. You helped a lot, you know. I'm really grateful for that." Andy's eyes were calm, direct. "You're welcome. Let's go to the playroom." CK had plans, and they were Dom-and-sub plans, not commiserating plans. And definitely not sitting-around- drooling-over-a-gorgeous-man plans. Andy nodded and got up, only looking slightly nervous. He followed CK into the playroom, gave his safewords, and undressed when CK asked him to do it. CK removed his shirt. He liked the balance between being dressed in front of a naked man and still being undressed enough to create a bond with his sub. "I'd like you to lie down on the table." Andy had been standing straight, seeming reasonably calm. Now the reluctance showed on his face. "You're not going to do that again? Please, CK." Alphabet Soup - 155 CK reached out, gently massaging Andy's shoulders. "You're going to be fine. Lie down." Andy didn't budge, his eyes pleading. It was the closest CK had seen Andy to downright rebellion. "Please don't make me do this, CK. Not this soon." The begging in Andy's voice cut right through CK, and for a moment he doubted his own plan. Then he cursed himself; this was what happened when you got too fond of a sub and stopped being a Dom. He stubbornly refused to listen to the little voice telling him that he would never have been able to help Andy the way he had if he hadn't been fond of him. "I know you can do it." CK didn't try to talk Andy into this. Instead, he held the man's shoulders with firm hands and pushed Andy down onto the table. This was a scene. He was convinced that it was going to be good for his sub. Andy would have to safeword to get out of it. Apart from that, it would be hard, but probably more so for CK than for Andy. The man had had the same misconceptions for so long that changing them wasn't going to be easy. Andy made a sound halfway between a moan and a sob, and the betrayal was clear on his face. But he let himself be pushed down, and he didn't resist when CK tied up his hands and feet. "Good." CK let his hands slide over Andy's body, making sure that the straps didn't chafe and giving his sub the physical contact that Andy needed right now. He ignored the way Andy turned away from him, allowing Andy the time needed to sink into the feeling of being restrained. He saw how Andy's body slowly relaxed, and he let his hands slide over Andy's chest, rubbing the muscles there on his way, before sitting on the edge of the table, holding Andy's head loosely between his hands. Alphabet Soup - 156 "Who abused you?" Andy seemed startled by the question and he forgot to look away. "I... Bryce did. But it wasn't exactly 'abuse.'" "Why not?" The questions had to be so short that Andy had no other choice than to answer. "Because... I already told you this." Andy was looking uneasy. "No, you didn't." "We were together for a long time, okay? And when that's the case, then it's not all black and white anymore." "He hit you. That's pretty black and white." "You don't get it!" The impatience radiated off Andy's body. He grabbed the straps and pulled them tightly before he made a visible effort to relax. "It wasn't one-sided. Not always, at least. I could have handled things better and avoided a lot of it." CK nodded. This was a recurring theme. "You know I don't curse much, right?" Andy seemed completely taken aback by CK's question. "I... Yes. But..." CK interrupted him. "I've even punished subs for swearing at me. There was this one guy who just couldn't stop himself; I had to punish him so often that he left my place with a butt full of bruises every single time we had a scene." "Okay." Andy looked as if he had decided to humor CK, but he still seemed puzzled. "Now, I want you to swear at me." "What? No. Why...?" "Swear at me." "I don't want to be punished!" Andy pulled at the straps, clearly bewildered. Alphabet Soup - 157 "Swear at me!" CK stood up, leaning over Andy's prone body, hands on Andy's shoulders. He knew he came across as very intimidating this way. "But why would I?" "Swear at me!" CK was shouting now. "FUCK YOU!" Andy shouted, too. Then he looked a little sick as he realized what he had done. "Good." CK pulled back a little. "Now, you just swore at me. I could punish you for that." "That would be fucking mean!" "Yes!" CK grabbed Andy's head again, holding him securely and staring into his eyes. "That would be fucking mean. And it would be my decision to be mean. Not yours." Andy blinked, and CK could almost see the thoughts churning in his head, the arguments he found and rejected again. "Not yours," CK repeated. Andy was quiet for a minute. "It's not the same." It didn't sound as if he believed his own words. "It is, and you know that." CK let go of Andy's head and patted his sub's shoulder. Then he began undoing the straps. "I... What are you doing?" "Letting you up, of course." "This is it?" There was disbelief in Andy's voice. "Yes. I wanted you to understand something about the dynamics of power in your relationship with Bryce. You understand it; no need to go on." "I never said I agree with you." There was a stubborn note in Andy's voice. CK just smiled. "You didn't have to." He undid the last strap. Andy accepted CK's outstretched hand and let himself be pulled into a sitting position. Alphabet Soup - 158 "This is it?" Andy repeated. "I go home now?" "I hope not." The look of relief on Andy's face was echoed deep inside CK. "You're welcome to leave, of course, but I hoped that we could cook and hang out and that you might want to spend the night." CK held his breath; this was the first time that he had asked Andy to stay without some sort of purpose behind it. Without it being a scene. "Okay." CK felt the little happy butterflies in his stomach flutter and admonished himself for being foolish. All teenager with this crush of his. "Wait. Does staying mean that I agree with you?" Andy stood up and followed CK out of the playroom, grabbing his discarded clothes on the way. CK rolled his eyes. "You do agree with me." "I never said that!" Andy kept grouching while he put on his pants. In the end, CK had to shut him up by kissing him thoroughly. It was a tough job, but someone had to do it. *** A couple of days later, CK was on his way to meet [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ] |
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